Wednesday, July 24, 2013

Good enough

A friend of mine shared the following image on Facebook a few days ago and it's resonated with me ever since:

 photo MelissaMc-accept_zps2396c7c2.jpg

First of all, can we all agree on the Melissa McCarthy love? She is so awesome. I love her to death. And in this instance, she is totally spot on.

So many of us who go through dramatic weight loss think we'll be pleased when we get to the "end" of our journeys. We think if we can just lose the weight, we will finally accept the person staring back at us from the mirror. Of course, that's not always the case. We do look and feel better, but I know I speak for myself and others when I say some of us go, "Is that it? Is this what I looked like underneath all that? Really?" So we pick. And piss. And moan.

"My stomach is horrible."
"I would kill for your thighs."
"I need $100,000 worth of plastics!"
"God, my bones stick out now! They hurt!"
"How did that woman lose more weight than me and look that good and I look like a freak??"
"Oh no....I don't look great. I still have 10 more pounds to lose."
"Now my nose is too big for my face."
"Where did these knobby knees come from??"
"I have a small bump one millimeter from my left big toenail that's bothering me. Maybe I need more plastics."

I could go on and on, but you get the drift.

The point is, after losing weight, we transform from fat chicks bitching about our weight to normal-weight chicks bitching about....everything. "Normal" women are notorious for complaining about their image and swatting away compliments like flies. We are no different.

When is good enough, good enough? As Melissa points out, where does it end?

I'm guilty of this myself! I've written in this very blog about some of the statements I'm listing here. Do I think I look better after losing 250 pounds? Yes. Do I think I look good? Not really. And I'm starting to worry that I'm putting too much pressure on this tummy tuck. I will not look perfect when it's done, in much the same way that the gastric bypass didn't make my life perfect, either. NO ONE looks perfect, and even if WE think someone does, trust me - that person can tell you about his or her 100 physical flaws they themselves see.

Until we focus on the inside, the outside will never measure up. I'm not talking about 25 pounds of excess skin. That's a legitimate health concern in some cases and should be dealt with however the individual sees fit. Some people are fine with it. More power to 'em! But for the most part, we have to come to terms with our own imperfections and embrace them as part of our unique self! Yeah, I know...what a bunch of hokey self-help crap. Well, not really. It is true, but very difficult to execute in the real world. Some of us may never get there. All we can do is try.

I will if you will!

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